Life Today

I kinda feel like I need Craig's permission before I write this post.  You know, just to make sure we're on the same page with everything.  I think that he'd agree with what I'm gonna let you in on here, though, so I'll fire away.

So, with great fear of jinxing everything I'm about to update everybody on, I'll go ahead and say that I think things have finally gotten into a pattern of leveling out.  And that's good.  Very good indeed.  Why?  Because for a while, I seriously thought that my capabilities were greatly waning.  I was questioning everything, and I really wasn't sure if I was doing things even a little bit right.  Lately, though, I've even sat down in the recliner in the living room and watched a little HGTV when the kiddos all hit the sack.  THAT is PROGRESS!

These days are different.  Some days are a lot different, some days are a little different, and some days still require a great deal of Dt. Mt. Dew.  But all in all, things are getting easier. 

Maya's eating is going very, very well.  She's taking all of her meals by spoon now, with virtually no bottle feedings at all, except for fluids.  She's off all baby food (with the exception of fruits, just because baby food is easier) and she eats the same food we eat.  My mom bought a Baby Bullet for us to use, so we puree everything that she eats.  She's still not chewing regularly.  She likes the flavor of yogurt melts, so I use that to manually help her learn to move her jaw up and down.  She seems to like the way it sounds when she uses her teeth, so that's a little motivation for her to do it on her own.  She won't do it for long, though, and she still doesn't know what to do with the food once its chewed up.  Again, its another new sensation for her that she'll have to get used to, but just like the other I'm confident that she'll pick it up when she's ready.  For now, we're just crazy happy to get her meals out of a bottle and into a spoon.

She's started school at the Sprayberry Center.  She goes on Mondays and Fridays, and here she receives occupational therapy, speech therapy, and physical therapy.  When I picked her up today, I got the chance to see her in action with her physical therapist and was able to talk to her about her progress and where we may see her at the end of the school year.  The therapist was helping her move from a sitting to standing position, and she said that she was very happy with where Maya was right now.  She expects Maya to have some orthotics soon to help her with support, primarily because her feet are so tiny.  Keep in mind that she's 3 1/2 and she's wearing a toddler size 3 in a shoe.  Just to give you a comparison, Daisee just turned four and she's in a 10.  She also expects to for Maya to be using a walker in the next few months, because her core support is increasing so well.  The grand result is that we fully expect her to be walking by the end of the school year.  This is fantastic news, obviously, and that day will certainly be welcomed with open arms.  And yes, we're still trying our darndest to get into RISE.  We'll keep trying until we eventually (hopefully) get accepted.

 

(Sorry that you're so blurry, Mattie.  Its just a cute pic of Maya that I needed to use.)

The other kids are making it in this big ol' family of six.  Ryan just returned from the Ironman Competition at Auburn University.  His CAP squadron competed as a team of six.  They didn't place in the top three, but I'm just extremely proud that he put his heart and soul into trying.  There were all sorts of physical tests they had to put themselves through, and I really wasn't sure he'd be all into competing, but he was excited to go, but EXHAUSTED when he came back.  I guess doing 600 sit-ups in less than 24 hours will do that to you. 

Daisee is still queen bee, with all of her eye-rolling and attitude-ing going on.  She's really kinda becoming a little sassy-pants, and we're having to put her in her place a little more than we used to.  I mean, we discipline, then turn the corner and go laugh when she says, "oh, grief . . ." at the thought of doing something she was told to do that wasn't exactly on her agenda at the moment.  We were hoping that when she had her checkup for her eyes a couple of weeks ago, we would see a little improvement, but we got nada.  One of her eyes sees 20/30, which isn't that terrible, but the other sees 20/70 which is just awful.  We're trying some prescription eye drops to try and strengthen the weak eye, and we'll go back in January to see what kind of progress we're making with those.  In the meantime, she'll just keep wearing her glasses and look cute.

Gavin is still doing well with homeschooling.  We're not attending co-op anymore, but he and I take Fridays and do something fun.  A couple of weeks ago we just had a science experiment day and got to make our own weather station and all sorts of goopy, gooey stuff . . .

 

We also got to go to All Fired Up one week and get artistic.  He's doin' up his own little soap dispenser . . . 'cause he's a germophobe and all.  He doesn't mind telling you that, either.

 

 

I know most of you want the dish on the kids, but for those that like a little romance in there with their comedy, Craig and I are still all up into each other, too.  Date nights continue to be a must, the occasional bouquet of flowers gets brought in, and an occasional 'just because' peck on the cheek continues to be appreciated and loved.  As I look back over the last seven years, God has truly had his hand all over us and our family.  I just never dreamed that all of this 'stuff' would happen when I joined forces with Craig Stewart.  Lots of ups and downs . . . LOTS.  But there's nobody in the world I'd rather ride the coaster with.  Another challenge?  Bring it. 

 

Just not today.  Property Brothers is about show, and I'd like to see that first.

 

Love,

 

 

Paige

 

 

 

 

Craig's Interview With Mark Foster of How To Be A Dad Today

A couple of weeks ago, Craig was contacted by Lifeline to participate in an interview with Mark Foster.  Mark plays many roles in his life being a pastor (Liberty Baptist Church - Holly Ridge, NC) , public speaker, dad, and husband.  He also operates a website (www.howtobeadadtoday.com) that focuses on helping fathers become the men God has designed them to be. 

He contacted Craig last week and asked him to participate in his weekly podcast.  The interview focuses on special needs adoption, and he did a terrific job sharing his heart with the listeners. If you're interested, the link below will take you directly to the interview that was aired last Thursday.

 http://www.howtobeadadtoday.com/special

Has Anybody Seen The Butter?

I'm back.

But I'm not so sure you should get used to it.  Things the last three weeks or so have gone so crazy, that I've begun to question the basic things I thought I knew the answer to.  Things like, "are these my socks?" , and "how did the butter end up in the bathroom cabinet?" are common types of questions that we hear on a daily basis now.  And I really don't know how to answer those things, because people, I have lost it.

Sanity.

I literally tossed it about three weeks ago. 

I'm realizing that craziness and chaos are what is going to consume this family for the next decade.  DECADE.  At least. 

Things have gotten hard.  Really hard.  There is NO time to sit down.  EVER.  We live every day literally completing one task only to start on another, and we're just plain worn out. 

Maya's eating took a nose dive.  She was doing so well the last time I wrote a blog post, but then she just stopped, and we have no clue as to what happened.  It was like the spoon terrified her again, and we were getting nowhere fast.  The frustration over this was about to eat us alive.  How could she do it one day, and then seem like she'd never done it at all the next?  And how in the world do you start all over in trying to teach somebody how to just simply swallow?  These are things that we all take so forgranted.  Just eating.  Maya doesn't yet have the cognition to just be able to eat, and its so incredibly hard to try and teach her when all she wants to do is shoot it back out.  I can't tell you how many times I've just broken down completely and SOBBED over this.  We're still in the process of coming back out of the cave on this issue, but the last few days have been better.  We think we've found a routine that seems to work for now, so until that turns into roadkill we'll keep doing what works for now. 

Things with the other kids have been at a non-stop pace, too.  Ryan has had football stuff every day, he and Gavin have gone back and forth to their dad's, doctor's appointments for everybody, we've all had this cruddy allergy/sinus stuff . . . seriously.  Just nonstop SOMETHING all of the time. 

There was one day that I just literally BROKE.  I was tired, I hadn't even carried on a conversation with my sweet husband the whole week, and stuff was breaking all over the place.  I sat on Ryan's bed and just wept while my mom listened.  That was truly my point of despair. 

This is all so hard.  We feel like we had kinda breezed through the first couple of months of bringing Maya home.  But then everything started happening at once and 'the way it is' wasn't the way we really wanted it to be.  Something had to change, because if it didn't we were going to literally end up in a heap on top of each other.

I was able to regroup and refocus.  Around the same time this happened, when I was questioning everything about what we had done (don't judge . . . y'all know I tell it all), I got notification that one of the little boys I had specifically prayed for in Bulgaria had died.  In his same institution, in his same crib, with no one.  He had died, and God reminded me all over again why we did what we did.
He reminded me again that this task he sent us to accomplish wasn't going to be an easy one.  We thought we realized this in our heads, but once we began to put LIFE into practice, it started getting  difficult.  Everything about it was squeezing us, and what was coming out wasn't what should've been. 

Since that point, things have been on the upswing.  As I said before, Maya's eating is getting a little better.  But we know, now, that it could bottom out all over again.  We're prepared, and we're not gonna fight her this time.  We'll wait until she's ready again and start over.  Football for TCHS is almost over.  Maya is scheduled to have surgery on her eyes November 1st to open up both tear ducts, but after that and a follow-up, hopefully we'll be done with doctor's appointments for a while.  Craig and I have made it a point that, at least every couple of weeks, we need to get out by ourselves for a real date.  Its hard to remember to do that when things are so fast paced, but its a priority.  So whether there's technically money for a babysitter in the budget or not, we're headed out to hold hands and be mushy for a while.

We had a great day today.  My mom and I loaded up the little kids, along with John William and Eli, and we went to the Barnyard for a little field trip.  The weather was beautiful and there was so much for them to do.  I wasn't sure how Maya would do in an environment like this, but I think she had a great time.  I took lots of pictures . . .

 

The pigs were definitely my favorite.  Cutest.  Things.  Ever.

 

If it looks like Daisee was squeezing this defenseless chick to death, that's because she absolutely was.  At one point, the poor thing couldn't even open its eyes because of the pressure of that sweet little hand of hers.

 

Maya liked the chick for 3.47 seconds . . .

 

 

Gavin loves this picture.  Its his 'photo bomb' that cracks him up . . .

 

 

 

Hayride . . .

 

 

And my favorite two pics . . .

 

 

This one below is definitely the picture of the day.  A Maya first . . . this is what brings the smile to my face when I REMEMBER why God chose US . . .

 

 

Simple delight. 

 

Just keep praying for all of us here.  We know there will be ups and downs, but sometimes we just need these reminders. 

 

 

Love to all,

 

Paige

 

 

 

 

 

 

Little Faker

See this chickadee?

She's been foolin' us.

All this time.  That girl has been all, "but I can't eat with a spoon!  They're the spawn of the devil himself, and you're NOT.  PUTTIN'.  THAT.  IN.  MY.  MOUTH.  I don't even know what to do with that nastiness that comes off of that thing." 

I mean, she may have some mental delays (whatever), but that sneaky little smile up there says it all.  I can hear it in her head even now.  "Nanny, nanny, boo boo!"  She's loved every bit of it, I'm sure, but . . . GAME OVER!  Do you HEAR ME?!  For the past four days, missy Maya has been downin' some spoon feedin'.

Four days ago, Craig said, "I don't know what's happening, but she's just gettin' it"!  So, yesterday Craig was gone and I decided to test the waters myself.  You see, kiddo and I hadn't been meshin' real well at feeding time.  We decided it was probably best that Craiggers take over for a while.  But yesterday . . . I mean, it had NO.THING. to do with jealousy of seeing the baby whisperer take control of the food reins and knock it outta the park . . . I don't think.  I just wanted to see what *might* would happen if I sat down at the high chair.  I envisioned an old western film where the two dudes are gettin' ready to do one of those gunslingin' duels.  You know, the 'let's see who moves first' kinda deal? I stared at her, and she stared at me.  She knew it was comin', and she darn well knew what she had up her sleeve. 

I brought out my guns (i.e. baby food) and she brought out hers (i.e. tongue).  From that point on, the battle raged.  Fast forward, people, and I WIN.  I WIN.  I stuck with it . . .

Ok, ok . . . enough.  Seriously.  The real story?  Maya wins.  She's three-years-old, and she's gettin' the hang of finally learning what its like to eat like a three-year-old.  We sat down tonight after last night's jar-and-a-half success and tried again.  A jar-and-a-half.  It wasn't pretty, and her bib looked like a rejected Picasso canvas, but she got at least half of it in her belly.  Tonight?  Even better.  Tonight we got even braver.  We managed to empty TWO JARS and a little bit of oatmeal cereal when things got a bit too soupy.  And we managed to do it with about half of the mess we made last night.

Things got exciting around here for a while.  We were all yellin' and hollerin', and she was gettin' down with it, too, with her little grins and all. 

I've tried to hold all of this optimism back thinking it may have just been a fluke.  But I think we may have it!  I emailed her therapist yesterday, and she replied back saying at some point, it just has to click.  I think Maya's brain may have been hearin' a morse code machine or something, because that's exactly what it did.  It just clicked.  PRAISE.  THE.  LORD.

This is honestly a ginormous answer to many, many prayers.  There were times my mind was seriously wondering stuff about feeding tubes, and there was even a tiny bit of discussion about it with the therapist last week.  Nothing like we were about to 'go there', but we all just talked about it.  God heard us, though, and as usual, he came through . . . shinin' like a Porter Wagoner outfit, I tell ya.

In other news . . .

We had our final checkup with the cardiologist today.  He said that every time he examines her, he learns something new.  This time he did a lot of imaging with her pulmonary valve.  This is what Dr. Chambers said may have to eventually be replaced.  He explained that sometimes with the kind of surgery Maya had, they surgeon will cut completely through the valve to do whatever it is he needs to do.  That pretty much makes the valve useless, and it has to be repaired immediately.  He didn't say this, but I imagine that they probably take care of this while they're doing the surgery for the original problem.  I mean, I'm not a doctor, but . . . well, you know. 

Anyway, They didn't cut through her entire valve, but they did cut through part of it, which kinda made it a one way street.  Go 'all or nothin' with me here, ok?  Basically, her valve works some, but not exactly like it should.  Its all good for now, sorta like her patch covering up that hole, but eventually that valve will probably have to be repaired, too.  So now we're looking at two eventual problems.  Nothing in the near future, but when she really gets growing they'll have to be addressed.  I guess when I said 'final checkup', I just meant that we don't have to go every month anymore.  He still wants to see us every 6-8 months to keep checking on those other pesky little issues.

But for now, well, we're just gonna eat.  And I'm ok with that.

And since you're so happy for us, too, go make yourself a sundae.  It's Friday, people.

Love,

Paige

Fire And Ice

Gavin and I did the coolest thing today. Sometimes school can get boring, but then sometimes you can make candles. Candles made out of wax and ICE!

This was so much fun, and really easy to do.

Wash out a milk carton and grab your materials . . .

 

Make yourself a double boiler using a wide pan and a large tin can.  Put several cubes of wax into the can, and let the hot water do its thing and melt the wax . . .

 

 

 

Once the wax has melted, gather up a bunch of ice cubes and alternate layers of ice and glitter (you want to make sure you've got glitter going all through your candle) into your milk carton . . .

 

 

So, I skipped the part about tying candle wick around the pencil and letting it drop into the carton.  You should do that before doing all of this other stuff. 

 

Moving on . . .once your wax has melted completely, carefully pour it into the carton . . .

 

 

 

And here's what you've got . . .

 

 

Tomorrow we'll untie the wick from the pencil and peel away the paper carton.  The melted ice will leave holes all throughout the candle, making for a pretty little piece of decoration.

 

Check back for the finished product!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Truth

We're smack-dab in the middle of Gavin's school day.  He's working on science and I've just changed Maya's diaper and took her to a new 'center', so I have a few minutes to write about the truth of these days.

Rewind just a bit . . . I started making frequent trips to Birmingham a few weeks ago for Maya's therapy.  Right now, we're concentrating on OT just so she can figure out how to eat.  Plain and simple . . . how to eat.  Oooooh, no.  NOT plain and simple.

When the therapist says, "I'm not sure how we're gonna handle this", you know the ride has just begun, and the hill you're descending down is about to go into a black hole.  A hole that is JET BLACK, and gives no hint of light from the other side. 

We're in the hole, and its dark. 

Things are hard.  They're hard for us as Maya's family, and I know they're hard for her.  She doesn't understand the rubber contraption that's being circled around her mouth, just to get her used to a different feeling.  She doesn't understand the syringe with the big tube on the end that's put way back in her mouth.  She doesn't understand the feeling and taste of the food that's put on the back of her tongue.  To her, its an invasion.  To us, its basic. 

She has no idea how to make herself swallow.  While being fed with a bottle, the food is just automatically put down her throat, and she doesn't have to make an effort to get it where it needs to go.  Her cognitive skills are so low right now, that her brain has no idea what to do.  We don't know if its from her Down's being so severe, or if its a combination of that and the neglect she suffered in an institution.  We'll never know for sure, but the truth is, we're all frustrated.

I've prayed so hard over the last couple of weeks for God to give me the understanding and patience I need to get through her at-home part of her therapy.  I mean, how in the world do you TEACH a person to just simply swallow? 

God has answered my prayers, and I've made it through these feedings with a renewed since of compassion for my little girl.  When I stop to think about all of the things she's missed . . . love, touch, food, eye contact . . . all of those basic things in life, I have to literally 'renew my mind' and realize that this little girl is in need.  She's in need of the basics, and the truth is, God has brought her here for us to provide those things for her. 

I know that I've painted such a pretty picture of adoption.  What I feel like I've failed on, though, is bringing the truth to some aspects.  I would never, ever want to discourage a family that's considering adoption.  And I would never, ever want to change a thing that's happened with us over the past year.  The hard part of it is not knowing what in the world really happened with your child.  WHY did whatever-that-was have to happen?  How long will these hard things last?  Will she EVER talk to me?  Will she EVER learn how to eat food?  Will she EVER learn to walk?

Remember where that point of obedience to the Lord comes in, and you develop that compassion for tiny children who never even know what they're missing? That's when you become overwhelmed with a sense of urgency for those just like Maya who are dying simply because they're 5, and they've been moved to an adult mental institution.  This happened to Stacey, a little girl in Eastern Europe with Down Syndrome.  She 'aged out' of her orphanage and was moved, and died just a few months later.  WHY?  Because she was neglected.  Sheer neglect.  You can't treat a mentally disabled 5-year-old as an adult and expect him or her to thrive. 

Every day takes a new energy.  And every day, God provides that new energy.  While we worked on feeding this morning, God gave me the encouragement I needed.  Maya swallowed probably 30% (I have no idea how I came up with that percentage, but it seems to make sense) of what was put in her mouth.  That seems like a low number, but compared to other days, this was a pretty successful feeding time. 

She doesn't enjoy it at all.  She fights for most of the session, but somehow a little bit made it to her tummy.  We're hoping that the more we do this, she'll recognize the routine and keep swallowing.  As far as her PT goes, she doesn't enjoy her tummy time much, either, but if one of the other kids gets in front of her as we're working, its enough of a distraction that we can get through ten minutes or so of playtime in that position. 

My friend and sounding board, Tesney, wrote a blog post last week kinda laying it all out.  All adoptions require sacrifice, extra time, lots of money, and all aspects of understanding.  With very special needs, though, comes a whole different myriad of emotions and requirements.  But this is absolutely what we wanted, and what God wanted.  One thing that's extra-special about Maya is her happiness.  She's been through so very much, but she still gives the sweetest smiles and squeals of laughter.  Even during feeding sessions, before her tears have even dried on her face, she'll find something to make her laugh. Sometimes in her crib when she's alone, I'll hear her laughing.  Simply amazing. 

I've said it before, but I really do think God reveals himself to these special kids in very special ways.  His heart is so incredibly close to children, and I believe that sometimes he must comfort her in a way that we're still not able to recognize or do.  I know that Maya's life now is so much better than it was three months ago.  I don't say that to bring attention to Craig and me, but God is the one that called us to this purpose.  He's the one that is equipping us with what we need to provide for ALL of our kids everyday.   

Sometimes I really do have to stop and think of what God has blessed us with.  He's given us a child that can find happiness, joy and contentment is almost anything. 

Many times, I have stopped and thought of the ways that he's confirmed what we're doing.  And I have to stop and think of my thankfulness to him for the people that have made things easier for us.  Just last night, I met a lady that I was buying a jumperoo from.  We were messaging back and forth on Facebook, so I told her a little of our story.  She was selling this thing to me for $15, which was a steal as far as I was concerned.  Maya loves the jumperoo in the church nursery, and its great exercise for her legs.  It was very much worth $15.  Twenty minutes after I left, I got another message from her saying that her heart told her to tear up my $15 check.  She wanted the toy to be a gift.  I can't tell you how many times something like that has happened.  Sometimes you just need a little confirmation to help you to keep going.

So what's the truth?  The truth is that this whole process is hard.   Its trying.  Its tiring.  We're trying to make sure that our other children continue to feel important, too, while helping one who is weak just learn how to adapt in a home and family.  The other truth, though, outweighs all of that.  The truth is, Maya is precious.  God made her perfectly.  God knew her whole picture.  God is using this whole bunch of us to bring his plan for her to light.  And we're all a family.  A family of six . . . praise the Lord for our full quiver!

The truth is that no matter what challenges we face, God is giving us a love for Maya that makes us want to see her as he does.  And because of this, we'll fight for her, claim her, and help her to be everything in the world that he wants her to be. 

Love,


Paige

The Sam's Experiment

Let me start off by making it clear that we ARE NOT wealthy people.  Ok.  Everybody got that?  Good . . . now let's move on.

Since we ARE NOT wealthy people, our family has learned to live on a monthly budget.  This means that at the 1st of every month, Craig and I sit down together and we discuss how much money will come in, and how much money we expect to spend in the different categories we've got lined up.  This works well for us.  Not that everything always works out to the penny, because there's plenty of times money doesn't come in as expected.  And there's plenty of times that things happen that can't be planned for, like car repairs, doctor visits, etc.  But for the most part, we plan pretty well the coming in's and going out's.  Its really helped us in keeping track of our money and being able to save for various things that we want to do, see, and experience.

Another thing its helped us to do is stay out of debt.  Craig and I have been married for seven years, and through careful planning and a little bit of frugality, we've managed to stay debt-free, with the exception of our monthly house payment.  So let me draw your attention back to the first statement.  I don't work outside of our home, so we live off of one income.  We certainly don't live lavishly.  My van is seven years old, and Craig's car is twelve years old, but they're paid for.  Our house is pretty big, but it certainly isn't fancy.  You won't find a single recessed light bulb, Jacuzzi tub, or swimming pool.  For us, its more important to have experiences as a family as opposed to stuff.  Not that stuff is bad, but we just like to have fun more.  The next point is a little bit of a 'grrr' between me and Craig, but I have to say that he's definitely in the right, because he LOVES to save money.  I love to SPEND money.  I'm not a big shopper, but again, I love vacations, roller coasters, and airplanes.  Those things all involve spending more than $20 at a time.  But, we save money and that's important . . . so says Craig.  Yes.  Roller coasters are not importa . . . oh yes they are.  Sometimes.

Anyway, since we became the family that has four children now (see that other post from a couple of weeks ago) we're learning to become even MORE frugal.  I love hand-me-downs, garage sales, thrift stores, and SAM'S CLUB.  So, here's my point . . .

Eating out and daily grocery store trips are no fun anymore . . . not at all.  Eating out sometimes seemed easier because of schedules that kept us here and there, and if I didn't plan a menu ahead of time, that required me figuring meals out on the fly and heading to Publix EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.  I know every single aisle in that store, and I can tell you where an exact item is located on the aisle.  I don't like knowing that information.  If I know it that well, Publix should then hire me to work the phones from home giving out customer service information, so I'd rather be ignorant. 

I had an idea of getting a Sam's card and shopping there monthly for all of the food, personal care, and home cleaning supplies we'd use in a month.  The main goal was to buy all of our meat, lunch food, snacks, and drinks.  So, me and my mom headed down there the first Saturday that came in August.  I didn't have a list, simply because I wasn't sure what all I would find that we'd actually eat.  I wish I had taken a picture of my buggy . . . or buggIES.  I mean, do you know that Sam's buggies are GINORMOUS?  I filled up almost TWO ENTIRE BUGGIES.  It was absolutely awesome.  I bought it all . . . chicken, pork tenderloins, ground round, sandwich meat, cheese, frozen pizzas, chips, brownies, milk, vegetables, frozen BBQ . . . I can't even tell you all the stuff I bought.  What I CAN tell you, though, is that same day, I shooooore did go out and buy myself a deep freezer for the garage.  Filled that joker up.  That day, I spent $525 on food we'd eat for the entire month and for the other stuff we use frequently.  Now, Craig or I will go to Publix once or twice a week for fresh produce, bread, and the 'fillers' that we use for our meals.  But.  In one month, we've managed to save almost $300 from our food budget alone.  If we continue on this track, we'll have saved $3600 by the end of the year.  That's just on food cost alone! 

Please don't take all of this the wrong way.  I'm not writing this out of arrogance.  I've been in the circles of people that were trying to figure out cheaper and easier ways to feed our families, wash our clothes, and still save money in the process.  Many times, I've initiated those conversations just trying desperately to get ideas from other mamas.  But, oh my goodness,  I think I've figured it out!  Its by buying a SAM'S MEMBERSHIP!  $300 saved in a month is an awful lot for us.  I mean, do you realize that's a Six Flags trip?!

I do.  I realize it.  And I might just plan a little vacation for us.  And the Cowart girls, and maybe even Ellen.  But that's a whole 'nuther blog post . . .

Love,

Paige

Cardiology and IAC Check-Up

We've had a week of doctor's appointments.

We started off Monday at the cardiologist to have a re-check since we ditched three of her heart meds.  She's doing really well.  So well, in fact, that our kiddo is MEDICINE FREE!  Dr. Colvin didn't see the need to continue the Lasix that she was still taking, so he said we were done . . . for now.  When he did the ultrasound, we could see that there's still some backflow coming back in once the blood is pumped out, but he didn't think that it was enough to worry about for the time being.  He also checked her liver to make sure that there was no swelling there, and we got the all-clear on that, too.  We'll go back once more in six weeks to re-check, but he expects everything will be fine. 

Today we went back to the International Adoption Clinic for a follow-up.  Things have gotten kind of frustrating the last few days with Maya's eating and drinking, or the lack thereof, really.  We've been trying to get her used to a spoon since we left clinic the first time.  For the first week, things were really good and we believed that we were making some headway.  But, things got frustrating and she really began spitting more out than she took in.  We were never really trying to make a 'meal' out of the practice runs, just trying to get her desensitized to objects in her mouth.  The good thing is that her gag reflex finally went away.  When we first brought her home, and when we were still in Bulgaria, if anything even touched her tongue other than her bottle, she'd instantly gag.  She's not doing that anymore, but she's also STOPPED taking her liquids.  We were having to give her liquids through a syringe, but the last three days, she got to where she would get really upset, and she'd just hold it in her mouth.  Most of it would eventually come out.  Frustration doesn't do justice to what we were feeling.  We knew she needed to drink, especially before the appointment today.  We were going to try and get her blood drawn since we weren't able to do it last time, but it was a no-go again.  This is still due to her lack of fluids and a large part is also due to her low muscle tone.  Your veins are held in place by your muscles, and when there's no muscle to hold them, they kinda just flop all over the place.  That makes trying to get a stick very difficult.  We're gonna try that again in three months, hoping that between now and then these issues will be resolved somewhat.

Back to the liquids and feeding issues . . .  Dr. Chambers has told us just to stop trying to do the synringe method.  Since we're all getting frustrated with each other, she said it just wasn't worth it.  She's peeing well, so she's not dangerously dehydrated.  We had a session with the occupational therapist today (who also happens to be a feeding specialist) and she worked with her a lot on the spoon.  She also suggested that we try and just see what would happen if we just put straight formula in her bottle.  Do you know she took that stuff like a champ out of that bottle?  She ended up spitting up a good bit, but she got it in!  The plan now is to take the cereal out (since we really only used that to make the bottle thicker . . . there's really no nutritional benefit there) and just put formula and baby food in.  I tried that with her once we got home, and she did GREAT.  She did spit up some, but, by golly, she took it, and that was the goal.  I also tried working with her on her spoon feeding.  It wasn't anywhere near perfect, but we got through it and I think she kept a good bit in.  The problem is in swallowing.  With a bottle, she can't help but swallow.  It all comes from that little natural reflex we have as babies.  But with a spoon, its a different process, different feeling, and a different method that's completely foreign to her.  She doesn't even really know what in the world is going in her mouth, because all she's known is the feeling of that bottle nipple.  So, any progress is good progress, and today we've made an teeny-weeny amount of progress.

Maya also had an audiology appointment today.  Normal hearing tests would show that sound is acknowledged between 0-25 decibels, but most of her results came in a 40-50 decibels.  That may seem a little worrisome, but the audiologist thought that those results came in like that because that's where a child at her developmental age (6-9 months) would score.  The computer-based test that evaluated her cochlea looked fine, and they relied heavily on that, too. 

We'll keep seeing the feeding specialist in Birmingham until we get this resolved.  Its inconvenient, its costly, its frequent, but we vowed to do whatever it took to take care of her.  We want the best for her, and as far as this issue goes, this is best. 

We have a meeting with Early Intervention next Thursday, so we'll see where that takes us with her other therapy needs. 

Keep praying for us.  We all need understanding, patience, and GRACE to get through this 'stuff'.  Its not all fun and games, but we knew it wouldn't be.  Everything else is great, so we can be thankful that we only have to really focus on one big problem for now.

Love y'all!


Paige

We Have FOUR Kids Now

Four.

Four kids.

Craig and I walk around absent-mindedly sometimes just repeating this statement.

WE HAVE FOUR KIDS.

We're learning that constant noise, constant questions, and constant runs up and down the stairs
are very normal these days.

One day last week, we started laughing hysterically with what all was going on at the same time.  We had just finished dinner.  I had a load of laundry in the washing machine.  Our washing machine isn't balanced right or something, so lots of times, it sounds and feels like the entire house we live in is being shook right off of its foundation.  And at this particular moment, it started its spin cycle and we all started movin' and shakin'.  At the same particular moment, Maya was in her bouncy seat, moving her head 'round and 'round making her 'uuuuhhhhh ahhhhhh' noises, getting louder as her head moved around to the front and softer as it moved to the back.  Daisee had gotten pretty furious about the TV not being on her favorite show, so she was just standing there, screaming.  Gavin was sitting with his elbows propped up on the table, BEGGING me to let him get up, because he just couldn't eat ANY. MORE.  And Ryan was just . . . well, he was just there, taking it all in. Please, people.  Imagine this, will you? Craig and I just looked at each other.  I mean, what do you do?  You just laugh.  Then you say . . . 'We have four kids'.

We're really beginning to learn what the new normal is like.  Sometimes its hectic . . . oh, good grief, its always hectic.  ALWAYS.  Ryan is going back and forth to football practice, sometimes twice a day.  He doesn't drive, so I'm usually the one going up and down the road.  I'm SO THANKFUL that TCHS is just a little ways down the road.  He loves being the team manager.  The first few days he was interacting with the team members a lot, working with the kickers and the passers some.  Lately, though, he's been filming the practices.  Its been hot and I've been waiting on him to start complaining about the heat, but he really hasn't.  He's made some new friends, and he's reconnected with old friends from his elementary school, so its been really good for him.  He's about to promote again with Civil Air Patrol.  He's almost halfway to completing the program, so from here on its gonna be a lot of hard work for him.  His progress and promotions will slow down some because of that, but the dedication and hard work he's done with them will be successful and worth it in the end, I'm sure.  Especially if he continues to desire a position with the Navy or the Air Force.  As the days progress, I'm believing more and more that this is where he's headed.  Although he's only fourteen, he's solid in what he desires to do with his life, and at this point, I think he's gonna stick with it.

Gavin got braces a couple of weeks ago . . .

 

He was pretty excited about getting them.  Now I think he's pretty excited about getting them taken off.  Poor kid needs lots of work done on his teeth, and this is just the initial stage of getting started.  I hear the cash register bell dingin' away already. 

 

We're getting ready to start school again.  We won't start for another couple of weeks, 'cause there's a lot going on right now (see above description).  We're gonna wait until Daisee starts back to preschool so there's only one other little kid here to take care of while we're taking care of schoolwork during the day.  Sometime amidst the chaos, I found time to have already done a month's worth of lesson plans.  I didn't do that many at a time even before we had an extra kid.  I consider that quite an accomplishment, so YAY ME.  I've never been much for artsy-type stuff before now, but we're doing lots of creative stuff this year.  I went last night and got most of the things we need for our first month . . .

 

When you see the Plaster of Paris box, you know things are about to get good.  That's not everything, but you get the idea of where I'm goin'.

Daisee is continuing to act like a 30-year-old.  I don't know where she gets all of her 'stuff', but she's a priss.  I was making her bed the other day and she wanted to know why.  I told her that some people were coming to look at our house, and she told me how 'interesting' she thought that was.  She loves to paint.  Everything.  She loves to paint everything.  Not just paper.  See? . . .

Don't miss the fact that my kitchen table is its own work of art.  She's only halfway through here, so by the time she was done, it was hard to tell the table from the paper.  She's excited to go back to school.  Almost every year she's gone she's had to be PEELED off of me the first few days, but I don't think that'll be a problem this year.  Craig and I have decided that from now on, including kindergarten, she's either gonna be the teacher's pet, or the teacher's nightmare.  You've really got to appreciate the kind of personality she has to love her to death.  But I do.  She cracks me up . . . a lot.

And Maya.

Maya is doing really, really great.  We're working on some initial home therapy exercises, and, weeeellll . . . it doesn't go so great most of the time.  I think she still thinks a spoon is a creation of Satan, and tummy time isn't usually pleasant.  We only spoon-feed and make her play on her tummy a few minutes a day, but I think we're all glad when that part's over.  However, she's becoming a lot more responsive to being held and loved on.  I even got a big smile from her this morning as she was laying on my lap . . .

 

She'll have her follow-up appointments with Dr. Chambers and Dr. Colvin next week to make sure that progress is definitely being made.  She'll also see an audiologist to check her hearing.  After that, I think we'll be done with medical stuff for a while.

 

We've shown our house once.  Things are slow with that right now, but we're pretty confident that it'll sell.  Maybe not this month or next, but somebody will look at it with the same eyes we did once and fall in love with it.  We're hoping to move into a new construction somewhere, so we're keeping up with what's available around here.

 

So things are good.  We're constantly trying to figure out ways to slow down, but we've about decided that's just really not possible right now.  Craig and I talked just last night about the pace of everything, but I guess when it comes down to it, as long as everybody's generally happy and active in the things they're involved in, that's probably the point at where we're supposed to be.  I can't wait for fall.  Its hard to get out of the house right now when the air is as thick as butter.  When that first cool front comes through, though, we'll hit the parks and learn to love the outdoors again.  At least that'll feel like slowing down, if we can all get outside and just run a little bit, you know? 

 

We have four kids and we're crazy busy, but we're thankful and enjoying our lives with them.  They make us laugh, make us love, and make us want to bang our heads against a wall sometimes, but there's not a single thing we would change. 

 

It's a crazy, wonderful, beautiful life.

 

Love,

 

 

Paige

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

International Adoption Clinic Appointment

Today was a big day. 

Maya had her first comprehensive doctor's visit today, and we couldn't be more pleased with how everything seems to be doing with her.

 The only concern we have at this point is that she's a little dehydrated.  Nothing serious, but there were problems drawing blood today.  Problems to the point of . . . like, they didn't get any.  Her veins were just too small and they attributed this to her lack of fluid intake.  Maya has never liked to drink any kind of thin liquid.  She takes a bottle like its her last (the kind that's got all of her solid food mushed up in it), but juice, water, pedialyte . . . all of that is a big no-no to her.  Its concerned me all along, because it just seems to make sense that the 'meal' bottles she takes just isn't enough to give her the hydration she needs.  I've started just taking a syringe and using that to put juice in her mouth, forcing her to swallow it.  I do that a time or two after every bottle, but she doesn't like it at all.  We'll go back to the clinic in a few weeks for a re-check, so we've got to make sure that we've gotten plenty of fluids in her before that visit so they can get the blood drawn.  Those tests are some of the most important ones we need to have done, so that's gonna be key for our next visit. 

The next big step is beginning her therapies.  This stuff is all still very much up in the air.  The doctors there really want her in RISE, but RISE really wants us in Early Intervention (and I know I didn't update you on all of that, its just been hard to explain).  Things haven't exactly gone the way we wanted them to.  As is life, ya know?  What's meant to be will be in the end, and we'll do everything we can according to what's best for Maya.  Dr. Chambers just thinks we've GOT to get SOMETHING going, especially speech and occupational therapy, because she's just so far behind.  She can't communicate at all, and occupational therapy is important in helping her learn to eat solid food, and in learning to use her hands.

We had a chance to ask all of our specific questions, and Dr. Chambers was phenomenal at taking her time to answer each one thoroughly.  One of the few doctor's appointments I've ever been to where the doctor didn't seem rushed. One thing that is different for Maya, because of her Down's diagnosis, is her process with attachment/bonding.  This was SUPERBOLOUS (yes, that's a word . . . as of now) for me, because I'm ready to see my NBC people.  Look for me Wednesday night, 'cause me and my biddies will ALL be there!  She's just going to react differently than other adopted children.  If you think about many people with Down's, they're just all very 'people' people, so it just makes sense that, regardless, she's gonna probably just kinda 'take' to everybody.  She DEFINITELY needs to know that we're mama, daddy, brother, sister, and know what family is.  And we're not about to start leaving her behind without one of us for several weeks, but at least we can kinda come out now and revisit life as we know it.  VERY.  HAPPY.  NEWS.

The whole attachment thing is going very well now.  I definitely think she's developing/developed those bonds with me, and the rest of the family is falling right into place.  This is kinda the order things are supposed to go in, so I'm very pleased with her progress.  She likes to be held and played with for a longer amount of time now, so that was a big thing I was waiting on. 

So, we're moving right along in the right direction.  Things will fall into place as they need to in relation to therapies, so we're doing what we need to do and letting God handle the rest.  He's in control of it all, anyway. 

Thanks for the continued prayers for everything.  I know I've said it lots of times, but we just really appreciate everything . . . the donations, the gifts, the dinners, the babysitting . . . just everything.  If you've participated in any way, we couldn't have done it without you, and I sincerely mean that. 

Ok.  I'm out.  Have a lovely, air-conditioned afternoon :).

Love,

Paige

Yay, Maya!

This brought tears to my eyes today.

It was the first time I knew she understood me.

We've worked on this since the day we picked her up from the orphanage.  To most, its not a ginormous deal, but to me, its a breakthrough. 

Its a simple command . . ."Clap your hands, Maya!"

Any other time I've said this to her, a blank stare is all that's returned.

But today . . .

http://youtu.be/jMGKW4LSUs8

She understands me.  I know she does, and it makes me so, so happy.  I hope and pray that her understanding of love and family is increasing, too, and that it brings her a feeling of safety and comfort.

 

What a happy day :).

 

Love,

 

Paige

 

Lifesong Farms

From Lifesong . . .

Lifesong Farms. Through the partnership and expertise from our friends at Plant Sciences, Inc., jobs have been created for in-county orphan caregivers and orphan graduates who are transitioning into adulthood. The goal of Lifesong Farms is to not only benefit these individuals with employment, but also to establish sustainable businesses to help fund on-going orphan care.
Enjoy these updates from Lifesong Farms in Zambia and Ukraine...

"OUR LIVES HAVE BEEN CHANGED..." // Zambia

Because of the faithful work of our 16 farm ladies, we have been able to grow and sell berries to local grocery stores. More important than the berries sales, it is exciting to provide employment opportunities for these women, many of them widows, who care for multiple children.

Learn more about Lifesong Farms-Zambia>>

BERRIES SOLD IN GROCERIES // Ukraine

Strawberries from Lifesong Farms-Ukraine are now in 5 different grocery stores in the Kharkov area. Sergei (pictured) and Andrei, both Lifesong graduates, have done an excellent job heading up this project. It's been amazing to watch these two young men, once behind orphanage walls, grow in their relationship with Christ and develop the skills to become successful businessmen. We are thankful to give opportunities to not only these two young men, but over 100 graduates who are employed through Lifesong Farms and other opportunities.

Learn more about Lifesong Farms-Ukraine>>

READ MORE...

First Harvest is In! - Lifesong Farms-Ukraine share pictures and thoughts from their first harvest this year. Read More

Brush to Berries - Listen in to how Lifesong Farms got started in Zambia. Watch Video

A Growing Potential - Orphan graduates, Andrei and Sergei, receive intentional and godly mentorship through Lifesong Farms. Read more

Sustainable Business - Learn more about Lifesong's sustainable business efforts in Ukraine, Zambia and Honduras.  Read More

Life These Days

Things have very much normalized over the past few days.  The kids are back in full swing with all of their 'stuff', Craig's work has slowed down a bit from last week, and Maya is has seemed to adjust really well to life as a Stewart

I love this picture.  It's all my little people, and I love them.

 

The article about Maya's adoption was run in the Northport Gazette today.  My granddad went to get one out of a machine, and some papers from last week's edition were still in there.  I don't guess today's has made it out yet, but its on their Facebook page if you want to read it.  Most of you know her story, anyway, but its neat to be in the paper, I suppose :).

 

I took this video today of Maya in the bathtub.  After this long, she's finally gone all in and learned to enjoy the happiness of a good splash . . .

 

 

And yes, I was pretty wet after this.

 

Our house is for sale.  I have no idea how this happened.  Well . . . I do, but we weren't neccessarily planning on selling our house.  Kurt and Laura have bought a house and are moving out the end of August.  That left us with some decisions.  Leave the basement as is and find another renter for the same amount of rent per month, remodel basement and increase rent cost to pay to begin renovations on the main two levels of the house, or put it on the market and see if we get any bites.  Our realtor thinks that with the market on the increase as it is, our chances of selling are very good right now.  If it doesn't sell in six months we'll reevaluate, but we've had some interest already. We'll see what happens.  Lots of people have asked where we're going, and we don't have a clue.  HA!  Our only limitation right now is staying in the TCHS school zone, since Ryan is starting there next month. 

 

We always have excitement and something out of the ordinary going on, but that's how we like it.  Makes for a never-boring kind of life. 

 

I swear, one day I'm gonna get a personalized bumper sticker, or SOMETHING, that really puts our motto out there . . ."YOU JUST NEVER KNOW WITH THE STEWARTS"!

 

Love,

 

Paige

 

 

 

 

 

 

RISE Update

I made a phone call a few minutes before 11 this morning to Mrs. Terry, and she called back this afternoon with very encouraging news.

First of all, let me say what a joy it was to talk with her.  If there was ever a lady who has an encouraging spirit about her, this is her.  I walked away from that phone call feeling even better about our situation with Maya as a whole, and not only about our position with RISE.  She told me so many fantastic things about her own son that has Down's, and it made me so excited for Maya's future.  Just to know that there's so much potential to discover and know what her possibilities could really be is a tremendous blessing, and I'm so thankful for the time I spent talking with her.

She's going to help us get a time next week that Maya can be assessed by the therapists there at the center.  Since Maya has only been home for a week, we believe collectively that it would be best to start her off a slower rate.  In a nutshell, once she's been evaluated we'll probably go and do some therapeutic work once or twice a week for a while, and there will be things that I can even work on at home with her.  This will give us a chance to continue our adjustment to family life with her, but also begin giving her the therapy she needs. 

Our aim is that once she's ready for full-time involvement with RISE, we'll put her in a class that maybe doesn't match her numerical age, but would likely match her developmental level.  Mrs. Terry said that the three-year-old class there is literally busting at the seams right now, but if we can begin her work at an infantile level, that would be better for Maya, anyway, just because she's so far behind.

So . . . although we're not starting full-blown, all day 'school' for Maya, we've gotten our foot in the door and will be accessing some real help for her.  And we're very optimistic in believing that once she's really ready, there will be a spot for her in an age bracket that will fit her developmental needs.

Thank you all, again, for so many responses to the post last night.  I heard from so many people, and its a wonderful feeling to know that so many had our backs.  Funny thing was, I woke up to a message from a writer with the Northport Gazette.  He called us today and did a telephone interview, so our story will appear in Wednesday's (7/31) edition of that paper.

Its just amazing how this whole thing really snowballed, and we're so thankful for all of you that commented, messaged, called, and shared the link. 

Sometimes the hand of God reaches down and really pulls you really close.  There's no better feeling than that.

Love,

Paige